After posting 24 things I love about Martha, a blogging friend asked if our relationship was really that ideal. Well no. Of course not. Every relationship has it's challenges and adjustments. There are times when she frustrates the hell out me. So in the interest of balanced reporting, here are 24 things about her that irritate me.
1. She snores. Loudly.
2. Her idea of date night (which we alternate planning) is a going out for pizza and then a stroll through Home Depot to plan our next project. Last week - the grand opening of Tractor Supply!
3. She is constantly cleaning. She cleans around me, over me, through me. She vacuums up my laptop cords and shoelaces. She sprays cleaning stuff when I’m eating which really bothers me. She has been known to spray furniture polish on me.
4. She loves disturbing TV shows (Grimm, Sleepy Hollow, Once Upon a Time) which always chase me out of the room.
5. She never puts her clean laundry away. It just keeps piling higher and higher.
6. She’s a bed hog.
7. She’s a spender. I’m a saver.
8. She’s a pack rat. I hate clutter.
9. She wears socks to bed.
10. She cannot talk about anything emotional.
11. She can talk about basketball. Non-stop
12. She finishes my sentences. Almost always wrong.
13. She avoids any discussion to work out problems which is why we have continued to have the same argument. Over and over. For 24 years.
14. She is extremely forgetful. But very selectively forgetful. Did you return the library books? Crap, I’ll do it tomorrow. Did you make the dog’s vet appointment? No. Did you pick up that basketball net you needed? Of course.
15. She never pushes the seat back after she drives my car. Then I can't get in it.
16. She is lazy about recycling, something I am very passionate about.
17. She constantly tells me things about the little kids she works with that upset me. "So and so's mother was the only parent who didn't show up for the reading party. He sat there all alone and cried." That stuff just breaks my heart.
18. She has a lot of red neck in her.
19. She owns guns. Granted, they are her service guns from when she was a cop, but I hate having them in the house.
20. She always leaves stuff in her pockets and then throws it in the laundry. I am forever picking tissue shreds out of the washing machine. Or scraping melted and dried chapstick off of clothes. I mean, how hard is it to check your pockets first?
21. She is extremely competitive. About everything.
22. She curses. A lot.
23. She yells when she is angry. I cannot be around yelling.
24. She is all about speed in getting a project done. I am all about doing it right. For example, she doesn't care if she gets paint on the moldings. I take the time to remove moldings and hardware before painting. She is happy to cover up flaws (wallpaper will cover that crack) I want to fix them first.
Still, when I think about our time together, the good far, far outweighs the bad. And I’m sure her list about me would go on for pages. Probably rightfully so.
Yet even with the weeds that keep popping up, or those that have made a permanent residence, we have grown a warm and lovely garden together. Not perfect. But very, very beautiful.