Tuesday, February 16, 2016

Full of Grace - Why I Love Her

Martha loves basketball.  She has run a recreational travel program for girls for as long as I’ve known her.  As the director she has always given scholarships to girls who can’t afford the registration fees or uniforms.  And because she works in an elementary school she often hears about girls who are at risk and makes the effort to get them involved in sports.  She often drives girls who have no rides to practices or games and follows up with them after the season is over to help them stay on course.  It’s one of the biggest reasons I fell in love with her.  


Last year she accepted the High School Junior Varsity coach position.  Although not technically her boss, the varsity coach, Marc, runs the program.  I think I am being kind when I say he is more suited to be a Marine drill sergeant than a girls’ coach.  Martha has clashed with him on many, many occasions but my favorites are why I love her:


Last year Martha became aware of a young woman who was cutting herself.  Martha immediately talked her into trying out for the JV team.  Of course Marc said that she wasn’t good enough to make the team and there were only enough uniforms for the players who would make it.  Martha paid for an extra uniform and Sky became part of the team. She didn’t get much playing time, but whenever the team was up by a lot or down by a lot, Sky went into the game.  At one game Martha told the rest of her team not to shoot but to keep feeding the ball to Sky.  It took quite a few attempts but Sky eventually scored her first points.  The team and fans gave her an ovation.  Her mother was crying. And when Sky came off the court she gave Martha a huge hug.  Marc sat on the bench scowling and after the game gave Martha quite the dressing down.  She smiled through it all because she knows. She knows what’s important.


This year I went to a game and saw a young boy with Martha.  Cody was a special needs kid she knew from school.and found out he loved basketball. She got him a team jersey and let him sit on the bench. Marc was glaring at her but she just shrugged and told him the kid was the team’s biggest fan. When the team scored, the Cody started running up and down in front of the bench clapping and waving his arms incessantly.  Marc had steam coming out his ears and Martha very gently told Cody that he had to stay behind the bench if he couldn’t stay seated.  Later Cody’s mom called to say that it was the best night of Cody’s life.  Marc also called that night to say “Never again. The bench is for players and staff only”.  At the next game Cody was next to the bench, at the scorer's table, where he then was at every home game.

And this is why I love her.  We have our problems.  We have our arguments. She can push all my buttons, as I’m sure I do to her.  But at the end of the day, there is no one I’d rather share my life with than a person who stands up for children, especially those who need a little extra help and attention.  I am so proud to be with her and so very grateful to have her in my life.

19 comments:

  1. The world needs more people like Martha! My wife was the same way when she was teaching. I am very grateful as well. I am glad you found that someone!

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    1. I think it very sad that teachers and coaches are now so hemmed in by rules and mandates that they don't get to *teach* anymore. The joy of learning and the love of the game has all but disappeared.

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  2. What a wonderful tribute to your partner! Those kids will remember her for the rest of their lives. And, who knows, maybe Mr Drill Sergeant will learn a little lesson on compassion. It could happen!
    Thanks for sharing...
    xoxox

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    1. I don't think it will happen, nor do I think he'll be coaching next year as there have been so many complaints.

      Funny that whenever we are out in public someone is always saying hello to Martha. When I ask who they are the answer is always either "I coached them" or "I arrested them". Yep, she is remembered : )

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  3. This is lovely. I know another coach like her, but in California. She's completely committed to the girls she coaches. (She's now the head of the program at her high school and doesn't have to deal with a Marc.) They're a special group.

    Also, I moved my kid when he was playing baseball from a team with a coach like Marc to a team with a coach like Martha. Guess which team took the regionals? Yeah, that would be the Martha team. Ironically pitted against the Marc time for the final game.

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    1. I am a little fearful that they will ask Martha to coach varsity next year. She would be great at it, but it is a much larger time commitment, with programs running all year. I barely see her at all from October to February.

      And yep, Martha's team ended the season 12-4. Marc 7-9 and had two seniors quit mid-year which is unheard of. Ugh.

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  4. How lovely! Those children will never forget her and she is probably a pivotal person in their lives. I am sure you both deserve each other:)

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    1. I'm quite sure she deserves better : )

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  5. Verklempt.
    'nuff said.
    :-)

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    1. Well, if it would make you feel any better, I could write a post about all the ways she drives me nuts : )

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    2. I am sure the love will still shine through.

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    3. I am sure the love will still shine through.

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  6. That's beautiful - I can see why you love her.

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  7. go martha!!!! thank you on behalf of all humanity!

    what a lucky luck of the draw to love someone so kind and brave. or more likely it's not luck it's because it takes one to know one..

    love love
    kj

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