Coming are
- 1,000 of Beanie’s closest Facebook friends : )
- all of her basketball coaches going back to third grade.
- a few of her favorite teachers
- families of her closest friends
- all of our neighbors
- folks from Martha’s work (most of whom I have never met)
- folks from my work
- most of Martha’s small extended family
- no one from my family as they will be here in a few weeks for an extended stay
-friends of me and Martha (mostly queer)
- my closest friends from my life before Martha (all queer)
- Martha’s closest friends from her life before me (mostly queer)
- folks from church (kidding - no one from church was invited. Sad. )
And I was thinking that all of these groups of people operate in parallel but separate universes in my life and very rarely ever intermingle. Occasionally some of our queer friends would go to one of Beanie’s games and we would introduce them to some of the parents. A few times we have had a spur of the moment BBQ and invited our closest friends that included gay and straight people.
But the reality is, our queer social life has been very separate from our life as parents, which is separate from our employment, which is separate from family. All of these communities exist in their own separate realm. And I think I am probably a different person in each situation - very relaxed when with my oldest and dearest friends, serious and responsible as a parent, a professional when working and a mixture of all of them when with family.On Saturday all of my worlds will collide in my backyard. My born again secretary, who only recently relinquished the idea that I am doomed to hell, will be introduced to a whole gaggle of gay folks. Probably more gay folks than she will ever meet in her entire life. The PTA moms who will show up in their designer outfits and perfectly coiffed hair will share tables with inked and pierced dykes. My co-workers, who have only seen me in professional attire will most likely see me in a bathing suit playing pool volleyball. And my unmarried/childless queer friends will undoubtedly shake their heads and wonder when I became part of the establishment.
I am not sure I am going to enjoy this.
Oh, come on. It won't be that bad. And I promise not to laugh when you morph into Donna Reed.
ReplyDeleteAnd maybe--just maybe--you will find that you are beginning to integrate all the aspects of your life again, and it will be a happy thing when you realize that the PTA moms, the pierced-and-inked dykes, the colleagues, and the childless queers can stand around and have a beer/take a dip/play a game together and the world won't come to an end. :-)
ReplyDeleteThat's what I'll be praying for, anyway....
Cheers,
Doxy
"wonder when I became part of the establishment" - that made me smile.
ReplyDeleteI think, just possibly, if you can keep an open mind, you'll see that all these people will be able to find something in common. It's like that sometimes.
Have fun!
I love those kinds of parties! I'm thinking you'll have a wonderful time and get to be your real, complex self with everybody.
ReplyDeleteHave a fantastic time!
I think it'll be awesome! I can't wait to hear about it!
ReplyDeleteI would have a hard time with it too - I've never been very good at allowing worlds to collide. But once you do it, it's done. Everyone will know eachother and know the many different sides of you. I can't imagine there's anything not to love. Have fun.
ReplyDeleteThey might all surprise you. They may all get along just fine. :) I was surprised with all of our worlds came together for our house warming party. All these different people got a long so well because all of them were there for the same thing - to wish us luck, love, and happiness in our new home.
ReplyDeleteYour party sounds awesome!