Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Full of Grace - Mother’s Day

This was my second Mother’s Day without my mother.  I thought it would get easier, but no.   With the passing of time, I realize more and more how much she taught me, how much she influenced every aspect of my life.  And how much I am like her - the good, and the pain in the ass stuff.    Still, to balance the missing ache, both my daughters made their way home.  

Here are some of the highlights of my day:

- An early call from my sister. We made each other cry talking about our mom and how much we miss her.   I am so glad to have someone to share this sorrow with.

- Peachie, who came Friday night, told me she couldn’t afford a present because she had to pay a $175 ticket for having an open container.   Yep, she always makes me proud.

-Instead she gave me a personal training session at the gym on Saturday, including measuring my VO2, which meant me pedaling a bike at a higher and higher resistance while she took my heart rate.  And then, after I was a sweaty mess and fearing a heart attack, she did my body fat calculations.  Just what every mom wants - her kid pulling lumps of fat off her body and measuring it with calipers.  I completed her testing (except the push ups which my recent surgery fortunately prohibited) and was pronounced fit. . .

. . . for my age.

Why does that phrase now linger after every health diagnosis?   But I digress . . .  

Her gift also included a lot of strength and endurance exercises and suggestions, especially designed for my hiking/backpacking training.  She had put a lot of time and thought into her work-up and I was very impressed.

-Beaner came only for Sunday.  She was supposed be home in the morning but was still hung over from Daiquiri Day on Saturday.  (Yup, so proud my daughters have learned to drink heartily in college : )  She rolled in around 1 pm.  But she did make dinner - spaghetti squash with homemade tomato sauce - to accommodate Martha’s WW diet.   Very good.

- Texts from the boyfriends wishing us a happy day.  I do like boyfriends who suck up the parentals.   

- Planting flowers and vegetables. Finally! I think Spring has at last arrived.

- My family gave me a gift of a Magical Bullet (thanks e for the recommendation)  and we all made fruit smoothies.    This will get a lot of good use in my household.   And I found whole websites full of Nutella smoothie recipes.  

-  Mother’s Day cards that made me cry.    I am a sentimental fool.

All in all, a bittersweet day.   So much missing my mother.   So much love from our daughters.  

I know so many people who struggle with Mother’s Day because they had hard or non-existent relationships with their mothers or their mother’s died so young.   Martha’s parents had both died before she was 14.  I was blessed to have my mom well into my adult life.  And I am grateful for every moment of it.


  1. AnonymousMay 13, 2014

    I am laughing because our college graduate was "under the weather" Sunday as well. Your personal training session sounds intense. I hope my children never come near me with any kind of caliper! Your Mother's day sounds like it was very nice. It is hard missing your mother - mine has been gone 6 years and I still miss her. Here is to you getting stronger!

  2. I don't suppose that missing our moms will ever go away. But, like you, I am grateful that I had her for as long as I did. Selfishly, I wanted more (and so did she), but we don't get to make those choices. Sigh.

    My daughter didn't come home but she did send cards and flowers and called. I love that kid so much! She also sent a card to my partner, just because.

    Glad you like the Magic Bullet! So much easier to clean than the blender, or god forbid, the food processor! Bring on the smoothies!

    Having your own personal trainer is awesome, as long as she isn't too much of a task master. Good thing she is still away at school... calipers -- shudder! Still, if it gets you to backpacking shape in time for the summer season, then all to the good.

    Happy Spring!

  3. It is a special gift to be able to take both the joys and sorrows of life, to be able to look at the past and the future, and be able to feel appreciation for it all. Happy Mother's Day to you and Martha.

  4. Bittersweet. I missed her but glad to have my son and daughter so near.

    Personal training, fitness evaluation: classic. Love.

    Glad Spring has sprung (though it is kind cool and very wet in these parts.)!

  5. AnonymousMay 18, 2014

    Thank you. Your daughters are precious. Made me smile. I hope my girls will be confident and loving the way you describe them.