Many, many years ago, I heard a pastor give a sermon about infidelity in marriage. He likened marriage to making soup but if one spouse strays, it's like spilling a huge amount of salt into the pot. There is no way to remove the salt - what’s done is done - and there are only two solutions. One is to throw the soup away and the other is to continually add more and more good things to the pot until the salt is no longer overwhelming.
September has always been a difficult month for me, mostly because of the traumatic anniversary. Memories wheedle their way into my head and heart and, if I'm not careful, guilt and shame and terror can drag me down dreaded rabbit holes. It’s like far too much salt dumps into my life and it darkens the entire month. But in recent years, so many good things have been added that the salt no longer ruins everything else.
Four years ago, my first grandchild was born at the beginning of September, and each year since, I’ve been able to celebrate him with my entire family gathered together. There’s nothing more joyful than watching the little guy tear into presents and devour birthday cake. And now I’ve just found out I will become a grandma for the 5th time come April - five grandchildren aged 4 and under, oh my! -a blessing that makes my heart swell.
It is also the month when I begin to shutter my veggie garden. This year’s harvest was abundant with much pasta sauce canned, zucchini bread and pesto made, green beans frozen and boxes of food given away to friends and family. An amazing bounty. But as much as I love tending the garden, come September, I am happy to see the work come to an end. To everything there is a season, and this is now the season to rest, to savor cider donuts, and to reflect with gratitude.
Though many of my Jewish friends and family have passed, I still practice many of the rituals that they shared with me. September is the month of Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur - a time of atonement. I have spent much humbling time seeking forgiveness from people I feel I have slighted, and except for one person, all have given me the gift of grace. And what a profound gift it is to start with a clean slate.
So as this season turns, I am reminded that while the salt in my life will never fully disappear, it can be balanced by joy, kindness and grace. Life, like soup, is never perfect - but with enough love and forgiveness, it can be deeply nourishing.
I hope you and your loved ones enjoy a season filled with good health, peace, and happiness.
And always, plenty of good, hearty soup.
