I had meant to start January with a post about positivity and healthy resolutions. But I got blindsided by a call saying that a friend’s granddaughter had committed suicide. Seventeen years old. Brillant. Had just received early admission to the ivy league school of her choice. It seemed that she was about to have everything she had worked so hard for. But she also suffered from depression. At first it was thought that she broke under the weight of academic pressure and expectation. But her diary revealed that she was also being bullied at school. Bullied to death. It is unimaginably horrendous how some people treat others.
She is the third person I know who lost their lives to depression. I also have many friends and relatives who battle with this illness daily, to varying degrees. I am far from an expert, but it seems like this illness is often triggered by, or reinforced by, a feeling of isolation, loneliness, or lack of support.
Compounding the problem today, we are in the midst of very troubling times. Politics, climate emergencies, broken health care, war. So much pain and loss. The causes for depression are multiplying. All, it seems, caused by greed and the insatiable desire for power and the need to feel better than someone else. I read a lot about history, and my biggest take-away is that humanity has always had people with a mean streak, with the most powerful people putting down those without power. Always wanting more. Always wanting to feel superior. Always at someone else’s expense. It’s a story as old as time.
In the face of all the sadness and isolation, I want to do better for folks who are suffering. I know they often mask their pain, and I wonder how many times I have completely missed the signs of a friend in need. Last year I lost a former colleague who I thought to be one of the happiest people - always smiling, always volunteering for everything, always extra social. She also suffered from depression. But no one knew. I just keep thinking about that - no one knew.
So one of my resolutions this year is to better educate myself on how to recognize and support folks who experience depression. But I also have to acknowledge that in most cases, unfortunately, I won’t even recognize it. So, what to do? Researching about it, I came across this:
“Kindness serves as a powerful antidote to depression”
So my resolution for this year is to be more aware of all folks I encounter. Those close to me and those anywhere in my orbit. Even the mean and ornery ones. Even the red ones and the rude ones and the ones who wouldn't give me the time of day. Just be kind to everyone. At every opportunity. All the time. It costs nothing.
n keep our balance we
